Mindy Tsonas Choi

{"Love Story" 6x6 mixed media on wood} It was a huge month in a lot of ways filled with personal triumphs and memorable milestones all topped off with a big shiny bow of gratitude.  This special edition of the monthly Crush List includes a round-up of some great sex-positive resources and events I want to share with you as a special thank for all the LOVE you shared.  Here's hoping that all of the positive cheers and caring nods you sent our way might inspire the rest of you to be a little more daring and real with your own sexy life! This is THE love pie that started it all, and actually a recipe my son came across while waiting in the dentist's office, Maple Pumpkin Pie with Salted Pecan Brittle .  We made it with a salted roasted pumpkin seed brittle so it would be nut-free friendly for this family, and it was so delicious (if you like that sort of thing.  I am not a pumpkin pie girl, but the boys enjoyed it).  This recipe is one for the books and will a

It's Thanksgivakah.  There is pumpkin pie and potato latkes to be made, gratitude to embrace and candles to be lit.  And I have been sick, which in a way has been a blessing in disguise as it has forced me to slow way down.  It's so easy to get swept up in the making and baking and buying and running from here to there.  Even from the couch and my achy motrin-filled haze, I could feel a teensy itch to hop online and do a little Etsy holiday shopping, but feeling equally disheartened by the fact that stores were already pushing Black Friday and ramping things up to start today.  Is nothing sacred? As a family who celebrates both Hanukkah and Christmas, and who also has multiple familial units with which we celebrate (blessed be), the holidays can be really, really abundant .  The shear volume of gifts that come and go in this house is humbling and the pressure of giving "enough" is always a manufactured worry this time of year, and I hate that feeling.  Alex and

How is it possibly November 25th?  I've been down the rabbit hole of icky monthly hormones, reading The Hunger Games like a fiend - initially to see if it was appropriate for my 10 year old to read and got totally hooked - and huddled under warm blankets for the last several days of icy cold weather.  My mojo went a bit haywire. Just 10 days ago, we were all driving in the car on the way to a family gathering and I was feeling kind of off.  I asked Alex to check when the full moon was because I could feel that intense tugging on my energy, and he gave me that sideways, "seriously?" reluctant smile.  It was, indeed, that time.  Extra confirmation that I wasn't going crazy.  At least not all of my own accord. My cycle is pretty regular, 28-29 days, spot on.  The moon shifts into 14.77 days of light and 14.77 days of darkness to complete its 29+ day cycle.  It is not lost on me that my ovaries and la Luna are quite often aligned to a T.  I laughed and told Alex i

I am happy to say that as of 2014 all of my creative work, writing, art and story-sharing, will be officially moving to MindyTsonas.com! It hit me with such clarity last week, that I have finally outgrown Wishstudio as my primary home.  Wishstudio will always be part of who I am, but that's just it... it is not who I am.  And this has been what my entire year was about, getting clear on my identity and what I want to create in the world.  My year of shedding is almost over, and after these last big layers of truth cracking open and letting in so much light, I feel ready to start anew again. I was marveling the other day while driving, over the many iterations of my online life.  There have been a lot and each one chronicles another layer of growth into my own being.  So here's a little retrospective I wanted to share, in case you might be feeling a little lost and confused like I was.  It's all an evolution and work in progress... keep going... keep trusting... kee

Dear Alex, I want you to know on this momentous occasion - your official coming out - I have such incredible admiration and love for who you are.  This conversation that you and I really began in earnest almost 4 years ago, about your bisexuality, has been one of such deep trust, complexity and honesty, that it has forever changed the person I am for the better, as well.  The more and more you embrace the person you truly are, the more complete our love seems to become, and I am infinitely grateful for this raw and soulful connection that we seem to have on so many levels. I think the hardest thing to do in life is to heal ourselves and grow into our own wholeness, and I am in awe of your brave spirit, your prevailing optimism, and your capacity for fierce self-knowledge and most of all, your ability to act on this wisdom even in the face of huge challenges.  You always find your way and by doing so, light my way as well. It is an absolute gift to be able to share this jour

Lately, this theme has been repeatedly coming up for me in many different forms.  In determining the guest lists to several gatherings, while driving through the city and giving money to a homeless person, when starting the conversation about about hard things, I have been bumping into this truth over and over: ---> I can only be responsible for my own story <--- Which means, the only thing I really have control over is my own actions and choices.  Everything else beyond that is someone else's story.  The nuances are subtle and it's often hard to discerned where to draw the line between myself and someone else, because all of our stories overlap.  It's tricky business.  But the danger is that by taking on or presuming too much of someone else's narrative, especially if it is only theoretical on my part, I can become paralyzed by outcomes that may not even real or have absolutely nothing to do with me. Thinking about all these possible contraindications -

image by artist and writer  Natasha Gornik   (note: her blog contains adult themes, so please be click aware ) A friend of mine recently pegged me spot on, as a hand-wringer.  It's not the most admirable quality, I know, but it just sometimes takes me a while to get through that period of questioning and mulling over before I can throw caution to the wind and just go all in.  What I am learning is that this level of conviction is so much more empowering and creates so much more momentum and clarity than staying in that grayish place of uncertainty for too long.  Even if I happen to change my mind about something halfway, it's all good because I then at least know which direction not to go.     I realized while writing the last post and then sitting with those niggling thoughts a bit longer and talking with my peeps, that I've been doing too much hemming and hawing and it was making me kind of nutty.  The gray area compounds itself of you let it.  I know wha

Oh, October... you swept us off our feet and piled on the fun!  The month was overflowing with sublime weather, loads of adventures, tons of creative time and togetherness, and so much LOVE & HAPPINESS!  There was also an ease in the fullness and so many little serendipities that made the moments memorable and chalk full of just-rightness.  It was juicy living in action, for sure, and I am grateful for every single second. While it's been 99% sunshine, the weather has begun to turn colder.  I broke down and turned the heat on when it dipped into the 30's a few times and we have been begun the evening ritual of sipping hot tea.  Our favorite right now is Jammin' Lemon Ginger  and it's keeping us warm and cozy. I have to give a shout out to the stellar spots that helped to make our anniversary weekend so blissfully amazing!   Gallery Tattoo in Concord, MA is the coolest art gallery/tattoo studio and in the heart of the burbs - who knew?  It's a total clas