Letting the chips fall where they may.... and as you can see, my two sided runes speak to ease and slowness and good ol' Plan B. You can imagine what the flip side would've said... Let's go out, Play, Plan A, Something New, etc... nope, not this time. It's Tried and True and Heart-centered, all the way.
I went into the surgery with such a sense of calm and peace, and I woke up hours later wrapped in such an abiding sense of love and ease - that's how I know that the timing was good, that I made the right choice, that the healing has already begun even though I can't tell yet. And I'm overwhelmed and so grateful for the abundance of love I received in words, in healing mojo, in pink blossoms, and in nurturing care and unwavering support. So much love - thank you.
My body is doing it's thing on its own time, in it's own way, and is in no way being made to rush. It's still holding onto what came before and waiting to release into what's next. Right now, staying present to what is, is all I can do. Just be in my body's wisdom, and right now it is super slow going in every way possible. Patience is not one of my highest virtues, I must say. The pain is still acute, the bandage is still on, the ill effects of the anesthesia are still with me... but all will be back in flow soon enough (reminder to self).
So, I am un-planning and easing off the gas as much as possible. I am thinking about what it means to deeply hold on and truly let go, and about being with this energy that is purposefully moving through me in a very physical and very emotional way. Out with the old, in with the new - I can honestly feel it on a cellular level.
I've treated myself to a perfectly timed cleanse beginning tomorrow, one that is meant to open up space and let in purpose and sensuality and beauty. A perfect way for me to feel my way back into my life with gorgeous intention. I'm so looking forward to it.
And in the center of my being, another surprise, a small physical reminder waiting to be revealed... my bellybutton. Once upon a time an unassuming innie, then for the last several years a bit of a broken outie, now supposedly restored back to it's usual humble state, but right now still tucked in tight in a little cotton cocoon. I missed my old bellybutton and can't wait to see it again, in another day or two. Practicing more patience. It might look like it's winking at me with the small, smile-shaped incision underneath it now. We shall see.
We shall see.