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Showing posts from September, 2014

Squam :: the stories within the story {part 2}

The story of finding my groove thing :: among the many gorgeous gifts, totems and talismans that found their way into my hands during this past week, finding this disco ball while out on a photo walk is one of my most favorite treasures. It will always remind me of my own inner illumination and to how I truly love to share that sassy sparkle. The story of urban alchemy  :: a gorgeous elixir of color, community, truth, faith, friendship, magic, and even a dose of sexy city grit. The landscape reflected back to me, in full-on beauty and shadow and light, the life I am living, right now. It was truly a feast of LOVE. The story of Squam from a new perspective  :: working behind the scenes, from beginning to end, has a different kind of magical energy than it would as if coming as an attendee or even a teacher. So I am learning about the gifts and the sacrifice of what it means to be a part of that magic, in a beautiful new way. 

i refuse to be a fringe dweller

"river of love" (so I'm calling this photo, which also harkens back to a silly story from our wedding ;) by Alex Tsonas I was listening to a podcast the other day, and a woman was talking about "fringe dwellers" or the people who exist on the margins of society. She considered herself one of them, as a female sex worker, educator, advocate. Somehow this idea really made me cringe, this notion of being pushed to the outer edges of society because of certain lifestyle choices or even innate desires/needs/orientations. I think for a lot of reasons I have always fought to find my place and belong. I do see in my current work/life how sex educators are marginalized in general, and if you are an advocate and also talk about actually having sex from a personal standpoint, this somehow makes you even less credible as a professional or intelligent human being -----> because our culture is so crazily sex-negative. And so I just felt so passionately and

Squam :: the stories within the story {part 1}

The story of shedding the old and starting anew :: of journeying and acknowledging how far I've come since my first trip to the lake - how I came literally in the dark, and how I found light in it all - in my own inner wisdom and all that is still to come.  The story of knowing just who I am ::  in this moment, in this skin, in this place in my life, feeling such an amazing grounded sense of presence and home, mirrored by beautiful people unabashedly sharing their stories and gratitude for my vulnerability and putting my life out there. And being utterly seen and fiercely (and saucily!) received. The story of a friendship come full circle :: finally   meeting face to face with Alex and how one little wish jar made almost 10 years ago and sent across the miles to a complete stranger, but kindred for sure, came to bear magic after a decade of dreaming, believing, connecting, and big wishes come true! (not the best photo of me, but a testament to my


Under this last super moon, I have been deep in the work of making things happen. It always amazes me when I reach these moments... when I realize just what my life has brought to bear. There is so much wonder in the magic of making wishes come true. Hard work and sacrifice too, of course, but big beautiful blessings and abundance, always.   Since it began, I always had dreams of going to Squam but truthfully, I never really fully believed I would get ever there. It was simply one of those 'someday' things that I didn't now if I could ever realistically pull off. It wasn't just about the logistics of time and money, it was more about the story of a deeper commitment and belief in myself. The belief that I was worthy, that I belonged, that I had a reason to be a part of that magic. And so, two years since I attended my first Squam something has shifted in my life, and I am now immersed in a love affair with it all! Not just the lake and bea

a bittersweet symphony

There is so much these days, piled on top of one another in a wild disarray of full-on living. It sort of looks like my kitchen table, covered with papers from school, boxes of feathers and heart-shaped confetti mixed with bags of school supplies, and several notebooks flung open mid scribble. Seems like everything is streaming at max cosmic capacity right now. Life is overflowing with pure abundance, turquoise bicycles dropping out of the sky. Yeah, it's been like that. Overwhelmingly full. So far, the new spaciousness is holding it all. A shiny new routine of putting two boys on the school bus every day, today being the inaugural event, momentous and bittersweet. That seems to be the overarching theme of this time of transition - excitement and joy swirled with a little uncertainty and overwhelm for all of us. It's a lot of changes all at once. In yoga the other day the focus was on the transitions, the space between the poses. Our teacher asked us to pay attention