As I drove home from saturday's workshop it suddenly and distinctly occurred to me that I've become a teacher of artful workshops in the sex-positive community, and conversely a teacher of sexy workshops inside the creative community. The irony struck me a bit off at first, like I might somehow be missing the mark, but then it all seemed to make perfect sense. Both look wildly similar on the outside, women sitting within purposeful circles spilling soul-centered insights and experiences using paper and paint as another way of expressing. Though if you leaned in to listen, the conversations inside each paradigm are vastly different depending on which door it was I entered through.
In the circles where the women come together to talk about sacred sexuality and relationships, creative pursuits are what push us into less familiar places. It's the exotic side dish in a world of fleshly delights. With creative kindreds it's the complete opposite. Exploring sexuality pushes us into new brave spaces and sharing about such tender things can be achingly unfamiliar and daunting, so we use the familiarity of words and paint and images to provide substance and from.
Safe spaces are utterly necessary and deeply needed for this kind of daring integration and exploration. Unlocking the way in, is the key. So my role is becoming more clearly defined. Every time I step in to teach a group of women, whether it's within a sexy space or in an art studio, the work is all the same - I become a tender of fires, a gatekeeper, a creator of conduits. The alchemy is in the gathering and it's the subtext, not the context, that is what's really meaningful.
Sisterhood is the most powerful medium.
What I am actually teaching in all of my classes is how to access vulnerability. Giving permission to others and offering ways to touch new things inside themselves, while also sharing the gift of seeing one another, heart to heart, belly to belly, soul to soul. I love making room for these messy and revelatory conversations about intimacy and desire, whether it is in relationship to ourselves, a partner, or our own creative work, the journey I now realize is exactly the same.
The way in does not matter. Excavating truth and being seen is where all the magic happens.