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she is the storm

As always, the fall school plunge has brought with it swirling winds of change, new shoes scattered in its wake as proof of growth and moving on. A passing tropical storm, Mercury retro, and so much unsettled energy had us riding through all the bumps our first week back. Now solidly into week two, we are the tiniest bit more entrenched and small hints of rhythm are appearing on the horizon. I'd usually be at the lake helping host my favorite kindred gathering, amidst more hustle and bustle and awash in magic and love, but instead I am home helping to usher in transition alongside my own little tribe. The divine timing and grace of this decision is still seeping in.

Always sacrifice.

Always moving towards more possible ease.

We've started a new family ritual at dinnertime. Gratitude for all. More grounding in the sweetness that is our shared life. I've missed the gravity of the dinner table terribly as summer was so much coming and going with meals often spent in restaurants or on the fly. Bit by bit I am finding my way back to what feels most like home.

For me, it's been my morning routine of coffee, writing and gratitude, rooting in what I know which then allows me to reach further out towards making necessary change. Inverterasco. This season I am going for it. I am in the trenches of self study with more clarity than before. Through IFS and a healthy dose of complimentary spirit medicine, I'm mining through feelings and soulwork I have been avoiding for so long, I am in it. My life choices have caught up with me, finally landing me in that place of having to either do this work (for real) or make the hard decision to give up some critical part of the dream. It is simply where we are on our open marriage journey, and where I am on my own. The two are walking each other forward - big lessons on letting others in with the ripening of connections in all direction. So much change. So much learning inside of ancient fears and new horizons. Intimacy is a badass teacher, and wants all the love.

Yoga is helping me process all of the emotions being churned up by the therapeutic process. I've never employed this tactic quite in this way, and it seems to be beautifully complimentary. I understand on a cellular level now, how critical it is to embody this change and move and breathe through such a huge shift. I need to feel the heaviness dropping away as I excavate boulders and hidden gems too. The mat is bringing me back to ease and the necessary, physical act of pushing through and letting go.

I surrender.

At least I'm trying to... to be more like the eye of the storm and embrace the perfect calm inside all that power, wonder and change.


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